How I stay in Recovery from my Eating Disorder
There’s no one way to stay in recovery that works for every individual. But throughout my time in ERC and in the past 3 years of recovery, I’ve come up with a brief synopsis of what works for me.
( I’d be stoked to dive in deeper with you via email if you have any more questions about how I have coped with any situations you’ve experienced!)
I’ve been asked the following questions:
How do you staying recovery?
How do you follow your meal plan?
What helped you get through weight restoration?
How do you deal with other people making comments about their bodies around you?
And my only answer is truthful. I have hopes, dreams, and goals and I have values. And none of those can be fulfilled by letting my eating disorder back in. When I didn’t know what my path or passion was - I turned to my values to push my disordered voice aside.
I realized that I value connection more than I value isolation.
I realized that I value being present more than I value a calorie obsessed mindset.
I realized that I value honesty and vulnerability more than I value having “strong will power”.
I realized that I value education more than I value the ever changing diet culture profit making trends.
I realized that I will never show up as bright, as at peace, as warm if I spend another minute depriving myself of food, love, connection, and self love.
But I am still human and I still worry about my body and the foods I am eating. It just doesn’t dictate my day anymore.
My body is capable of processing the energy and directing where it needs to go in my body for me to function at my best. I trust my body and I stopped believing that my body needed to look a certain way for me to be attractive/lovable/healthy/fit. My body is my body and it deserves to be trusted.
And Food is food. I don’t love it and I don’t hate it. I eat because my body always needs energy so I can keep moving forward. It’s also cool because eating with people- and engaging in discussions and laughs - makes me super happy to be alive. Sometimes meals look like salads of rainbow hued veggies and sometimes that looks like a bag of chips and wine.
Figuring all of this out took me time. Dutiful and intentional time working through both relapses and high points, it’s all how I got here.
Little bit of that ol’ trial and error.
Maybe today spend a little bit of time thinking of things that you value. Jot down a few hopes, dreams, goals (the loftier and vivid the better!). And do it all with your favorite pen in your most fun handwriting. This is fun and playful and a way to spend some quality time with your true, beautiful, brilliant self.
Always open for comments and messages (firstname.lastname@example.org) <3
Gratitude on this Denver Snow Day!